Monday, November 12, 2012

Things Normal People Wouldn't Tell You - I'm a Mouse Magnet

So it's time for some idiotic banter here on the blog.
Brought to you by my oddball past: :O)
There are basically three mice stories that my family love to tell tales about.

Mice # 1 and Mice # 2 stories are indistinguishable timewise so we'll pretend they happened in this order.

The houses that I grew up in are basically in the middle of the sticks - surrounded by fields and such you know.

If there is one thing mice seem to like it's fields. Well, that and my grandma's house. :O)

They just like to sneak their little sneaky selves up the basement stairs and invade the house. Most particularly they liked to do it when I was around.
Grandma used Decon (poison) to take care of the little guys. But what they don't tell you is that Decon is like catnip for mice. They go freaking NUTS!!!

So Gina is sitting in the tub relaxing and I start hearing this little squeaking noise following by something hitting the tub. Yep M#1 is trying to vault his way into the tub with me.
I start screaming... but the door is locked and I was too freaked out to move to open it.
Actually my mind has blocked out the ending to that story. Mouse trauma!

Mouse # 2 I stepped on - barefooted... in the DARK. Darkness... fuzzy squeaking... yes I still have nightmares about it.
Cept this time when I started screaming, Grandma and Gem (oldest brother) came running. Grandma had a broom. Gem, well he just stood there laughing at what came next.
For some reason Grandma didn't take the handle end of the broom to the mouse. She decided instead to flog it to death.
FYI - hitting a mouse with the broom end of the broom doesn't really work. mind has blocked out the demise of that particular little vermin as well.
I sense a pattern. :P

Mouse # 3 - I name thee stealthy.
Jeff, Amelia, Jonathan and I all lived together for almost 2 years when Jonathan was a little tyke.
We had some good times.
The most infamous of which involves M#3.
He really only liked to show himself when no one but me was around.
The little dude would hide in the laundry room until he knew I was alone and then scamper out.
No... REALLY. Once I swear he peeked out, saw them sitting with me in the living room and went right back into his hole!
So one night I headed into the kitchen to grab some grub and out he scampered.
Now I did what anyone in their right mind would do if a mouse scampered into their path.
I jumped.
I jumped right the heck up on the kitchen counter.
So when Amelia hears the commotion she comes out to find me on TOP of the counter.
Pretty much all I remember is her laughing.  :O)
Stealthy, the mouse, was no where to be found.
I swear - totally justified reaction people!

-Gina  the Mouse Whisperer. :P