Posts
Today, it was this one... interspersed with a song called Cornerstone.
My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus’ blood and righteousness;
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly lean on Jesus’ name.
The oddest thing hit me while singing it today. What does it mean to "trust the sweetest frame?
So I did what everyone does in 2018 and searched the web for it.
But there is really not a definitive answer. What does that let me do?
It lets me search a bit deeper for why I was so undone by these lyrics today.
Once again, for the hundredth time in the foster journey, we are faced with uncertainty.
Things can turn so quickly. And you can go from 1 child to 2 (or 3).... or none.
What is the frame that my heart/spirit is compelled to trust?
Today - slamming into me like a ton of hymnals - I realized it was my own planning.
See, I have the frame for our family all set out. I have the future set in a picture on the wall.
"This is what I want God... work within that frame ok?"
But I dare not trust even the sweetest frame.
My plans rarely work out like I think they are going to.
I caught my reflection today in the car door as little man laughed and giggled as we drove home from church. I am happy in this frame. I would be content to let my family stay this way exactly.
But that is most likely not the path we are walking on.
The sweetest frame.
This is the life I wanted. It's the life I begged God for many times. There are laughs I never could have scripted. There are lows I would have chosen to avoid. But there is joy, so much joy.
Sweetest frame.
My carefully laid out plans - that frame - can fall apart in one instant.
If my trust is in the plan, instead of the Author of all plans, I am set up for great pain.
Frames and plans will be broken. He, will not.
I will be broken. He will not.
So I dare not trust my own sweet frame... but wholly lean on Jesus name.
-Gina
0 comments:
Post a Comment