Four Months - The Incredible Shrinking Woman

One of my sweet friends pointed out something the other day that I really appreciated.
She mentioned on my facebook wall that she knew this weight loss hadn't happened exactly the way I would have chosen.
It's something I've thought about a lot.
I've lost a little over 80 pounds now - that's like a 7th grader.
I'm now officially at a number that I never remember seeing on the scale. I actually think it is the weight I was when I moved away to college. But that was around the time I stopped weighing regularly so I'm not sure.
So very not my point. :O)
In 4 months I have changed insanely in many ways.
I'm off all medication except pain (back) and vitamins.
I've dropped 6 sizes at least.
I've changed the way I eat.
But so much of the struggle still exists with how I think.

I am well aware that many people who have gone through WLS gain weight back. Many of them re-start the habits that had gotten them to where they were previously. It is possible to eat way more than you should. It happens often.

4 months out I can tell you that scares me.
Because the surgery doesn't change your head. It only changes your body.
Yes, part of my rapid gain from the last two years came with the pain I was experiencing.
But before that happened I was at least 50 pounds overweight and had been for quite a while.
That did not happen rapidly. It crept up gradually by the choices that I made.
I won't get into the "how and why" of this because frankly - that's my issue.
As honest as I always hope to be in life, I am also always going to be protective of some areas because they just aren't public stuff!  :O)  Some things are just private.

Anyhoo

If I had my choice (as my friend Kim mentioned) I'd have loved to take a bit of the slow road down. I would have chosen to try to work through my food issues while working through my other issues.
But that wasn't going to happen for me.
I had been there and done that and things were getting steadily and progressively worse.

At 35 I was on high blood pressure medicine, had sleep apnea, getting ready to start cholesterol medication, and was slowly destroying several discs in my spine.

I was a mess. I was in pain every second of every day.
I was miserable.

I do not want to head back that way.

So at just past my 4 month mark I wanted to get some things down "for the record."
I think this is probably mostly for me. If I ever think that the fight against "old me" isn't worth it, these words are here to remind me.
"Old me" spent a lot of time miserable and in pain.
"New me" is starting to remember what moments without pain can be like... and more will come.

-G

Love - It's Not for the Faint of Heart

I've been re-reading some of my old journal entries over the last few days.
I am so very thankful that I have been at least semi-faithful to journaling since 1994. I always wish I had done a better job. Thankfully I have many, many things written down.
For some reason I was struck tonight by the realization that over the years loving people has just not been a fun deal sometimes.
Ok so I know that it reads a bit weird.
"But we're supposed to love people Gina!" "God commands it."
Certainly He does. We love naturally most of the time because people love us back. God loved us first, so we love Him.
A few years back I wrote in my journal something that was a revelation to me at the time.
Many times for us to really love - we must chose to love.
We must chose to love people because sometimes, ok a lot of the time, we human-type people are just flat out unlovable.
I don't know about the rest of you, but I know me pretty well.
Grouchy Gina
Un-happy Gina
Tired Gina
Not getting her way Gina.
All of those are pieces of me that can be pretty dang un-lovable.
Love is a choice at some of the most critical junctures of our lives.
We chose to love when we look past the sarcastic answer and don't fight back in kind.
We chose to love when the person we love hurts us.
We chose to love when we look to the person behind the obvious hurt or the not so obvious hurt that they carry.
We chose to love when we reach out to the person that makes our stomach curl by their appearance or attitude.
We chose to love in a hundred different ways.
Or...
We chose not to love.

No matter the season or reason for it, our love comes down to a choice.
   And even though right now it may seem like an easy choice.
        It will not always be that easy.
So determine in your heart and mind at this moment.
    That when the moment comes
        You will make the choice to love.
No. Matter. What.

Love on
-Gina

Marriage and Other Fun Things

I promise you that I will come back here soon and post some info about the wedding and life since.
As can be expected, the weeks leading up to the wedding were hectic health and other wise.
So I'm a wee bit behind.
I'll post one of my favorite wedding shots and call this puppy "updated" for a day or so.  :O)

You've Been Through a Lot

So I just passed the 2 month date on my surgery.
But the first surgery has almost been overshadowed at this point.
Who am I kidding? It's absolutely been overshadowed.
I went to see Dr. Roller today for a checkup from my gall bladder removal.
When his nurse was checking me in she kept commenting on the week that I was in the hospital and the two ER trips. She said she just kept getting fax after fax and could not believe it.
For those keeping score - Gall Bladder removed. Kidney Stent placed. DVT in arm within 5 days.
It's a lot.
And in case I am tempted to try and forget that - every. single. doctor reminds me!
Tomorrow it looks like I will be calling my kidney doc again because of an ongoing issue that shall not be named.
In the mean time, I await a referral to a hematologist. We're hoping to get an "all clear" to get me off of the blood thinners... which may help the "issue that shall not be named" as well. :O)

So - for those following along at home still. I have lost almost 60 pounds. It actually might be a little quicker but my current issue (thanks to the gall bladder removal in great part) is an almost complete aversion to just about every food imaginable.

I thank God for the original surgery. Without it the week long hospital visit and the aftermath would have been worse.
The gall bladder (which wasn't the worst the doctor had seen, but was pretty ugly) and kidney stone episode would have happened. But I would have been a brand new patient for all the surgeon's involved.
Instead of that, I had a top notch surgeon ready to go and familiar with me.

So many things to be thankful for! 

Wedding is in barely over two weeks. This past 9 months of engagement has been nothing like I had planned. But on 9/1 I get to become Mrs. Davis. So all-in-all things are just grand.
:o)
-Gina

It's Been a Long, Hard, Weird Road

Yikes people.
My life since the last time I blogged has been a roller coaster both physically and emotionally.
I can't sugar coat it. It's kinda sucked. :O)

Sunday July 22nd went to the ER in the afternoon (about 5 pm) thinking I had a kidney stone lodged somewhere.
I had already been through several days of not being able to keep anything - food or liquid or meds - down so I was pretty sure that I was also severely dehydrated.
Multiple tests, pokes, prods and vomiting hours later they finally settled on a kidney stone and multiple gall stones.
My weight loss surgeon (WLS) does gall bladders too so he asked for me to be admitted.
I didn't leave the hospital until Thursday afternoon.
The gall bladder was removed on Tuesday.
I was still in a lot of pain (and not able to keep anything on my stomach). They were pushing fluids in me which is a part of the reason why I stayed in the hospital for this whole time. The problem was that my veins were shot and kept blowing and such (whatever that means).
They wanted to put me into surgery again and help my kidneys... but I thought they were getting better (and all tests seemed to point that way too) so I said no let's do medicine and see if we can avoid that...
I was out of the hospital on Thursday night.

I ended up back in the ER on Friday morning - different ER on the advice of my WLS.
Dehydrated again.
Multiple sticks and prods to try and get IV's in.
Call to kidney doc - surgery to put in stint.
Surprisingly they let me go home.
On the way home, my arm felt weird and was a bit swollen but I was so happy to go home I barely noted it.
About 4 am I awake to find my hand and much of my left arm swollen badly.

6 am - back to the ER where the doctor sounds the alarm bell quickly. But I still didn't know why!

Diagnoses - left arm has blood clots. One is on the surface. One is deeply embedded in my upper arm (DVT).
I'm actually thankful that, at the time, I didn't know how dangerous that was. Everyone was freaked out. I was (in the words of the ER doc) "oddly calm."
I think that was God's protection on me honestly.

So the last few days have been a blur of pain meds, self-administered blood thinning shots, and pills.

Every day gets a little better.
I am thankful for much.

Wedding in less than a month now - YIPES.
Pray with us that what needs to get done, get's done. And that my stress level stays nice and low. :O)
-Gina

Things Normal People Wouldn't Tell You - The Sausage Ball Incident

So in my quest for protein I came up with the thought of trying sausage balls. Sausage, Cheese, Cream Cheese. Bisquick not the best.
But a girl's gotta do something.
So I get a recipe that my friend Melissa was kind enough to e-mail me. She is always posting something insanely good it seems like. These guys were no different.

Anyhoo.. the recipe was super but is besides the point of the story.
Let me start off by explaining some things.
I cook. But I tend to cook the same things over and over again. Right now, I can only eat about 1/2 cup of food at a time. So whatever I cook it either needs to work for me or be something that I can can give away.

You should also know that I've just recently discovered the wonders of cooking things on parchment paper. If you are cooking bread-less things it helps stuff not stick.

Now on to the sausage balls. Since I'm all in love with the parchment paper I decided to cook them on a cookie sheet covered with it.

An important thing to note is that parchment paper begins to get all crispy and burned at certain temperatures... one of which I found last night.

About 5 minutes into cooking the sausage balls I began to smell the paper burning.
No problem at all really. I'll just pop that out and take the parchment paper out.

The real moment of truth in most of my stories is the moment where my sense of humor and ingenuity meet. Such is the case with this story.

I decide that it would be easier/quicker/more fun to just yank the parchment paper out from underneath those cute little culinary delights. Certainly they will end up neatly on the cookie sheet.
Not so much

We could also call this the story of the flying sausage balls. Cause baby... that's what happened next.  :O)
Several of them ended up in salvageable places.
At least two of them ended up underneath the dishwasher. ewwwww.

Lesson learned and I now pass it onto you.
Never yank parchment paper off of a cookie sheet with  food on it.
Just. Don't.  :O)

Here ends the lesson.
-Gina the non-chef.

Oh - and for those of you who will most likely be asked to consume these guys. NONE of the next batches ended up on the floor.

One Month - Surgerversery. :O)

Well we made it to the 1 month mark. It's been one month since my surgery.
We've had some interesting ups and downs.
I know some people will find these posts because they are considering having a weight loss surgery.
That's what I did. I scoured the web for people's stories.
So in all fairness I have to say a few things.
It's been a tough month.

Just days after I began eating actual food (about 2 weeks ago) I ended up in the emergency room.
When several things in your abdomen have been messed with, you decide pain of any kind is worrisome.
So extreme pain is not a good sign. After hours of intensifying pain I gave up and went to the ER.
Verdict - Kidney stone.
Oh. My. Goodness. Please merciful Lord let me never do that again.
I've lived with some pretty extreme pain over the last two years with all the back issues.
This little stone put those in their place.
What it also did was skew my eating experience.
Nausea is a side effect. So I soon discovered that a big part of those first few days of problem eating (and subsequent hurling) was coming from the stone and not the surgery.

I reminded myself tonight that today marks two weeks of solid foods.
I'd be lying if I said it hadn't been a challenge.
My body has changed. My stomach has definitely changed.
My tastes have changed.
I'm having to relearn some very basic things.

I think my biggest lesson was to slow down.
Now that I'm a ways into this deal I know to take a small bite - chew it for a minute. Then wait another whole minute before another bite. It seems extreme. But it is the only way to really pay attention to how much is going in.
My total volume at each meal is 1/2 cup. It doesn't sound like much to you but it's an overwhelming amount most times.

I'm sitting at around 31 pounds total loss still. While the scale has not moved much in 2 weeks my body has. I knew there would have to be some catching up.

I'm guessing I'll start losing again in the next week or so.

Meanwhile - I have a wedding dress to try and buy.
I have to find a new place for future hubs and I to live come 9/1.
I have a ton of things to get rid of to make way for my new life.
I have almost a wedding shower a weekend.

Summary - I have a LOT to do.

If I had it to do over again, I think I might have tried to space out the whole marriage and drastic surgery just a tad.  :O)

Live and learn people.

-Gina

Two Weeks

Well it's been an adventure for sure.
There are lots of things that people can tell you to prepare for after a surgery like this.
Then there is the reality of what actually happens. That's going to be different for every person.
As for me, it's been rocky, but not too rocky.
I've had ups and downs. I've had mental breakdowns. I've wanted to hide underneath something and just sleep the days away several times.
Overall the best thing I can say is "I'm making it."
I saw my primary care doctor this morning to check my blood pressure out. At the beginning of the weekend (Friday) I realized that my bp was dipping pretty low and making me sick.  I couldn't stand long enough to even do something simple - like take a shower - without passing out.
Ugh - miserable feeling that. I do not recommend it.
By the time I saw my pcd my bp was back to a normal level. So that's the end of blood pressure medicine for me - woo.

As of this morning I've lost just shy of 30 pounds. The doctor kept saying things like "that's two weeks" "wow" over and over again. He was super pleased with my progress so far. Oh and he called me the incredible shrinking woman. :O)
I have to say I'm pretty pleased as well.
My body is definitely have issues adjusting to so much change so fast. That also helps account for the whoozy feelings. Also I have weird food cravings that smack me out of nowhere.

The changes are radical and hard to describe.
I'm trying to catch my equillibrium.
Mostly I'm looking forward to Thursday. That'll be my follow up appointment and the end of the "liquidpalooza" that my body has been enduring since 6/10.
Oh solid foods.... how I have missed you!  :O)

Well that's it from here.
I still need your prayers as I recover. There is still a long road ahead.
Plus - did I mention I'm getting married in like 60 days? What????

:O)

-Gina

Surgery - Weight Loss Journey

I've always tried to be open in my life. There are some things that are clearly private. There are also some things in life that need to be shared for our own good.
This post is about one of those things!
I've been pretty open on this blog in the past about my struggles with weight.
My struggles started in puberty and just compounded themselves year after year.
I would lose weight and gain it over and over again.
I have done just about every weight loss fad, program and diet that you can imagine.
I've been very successful a few times.
About two years ago I started to have major issues with  my back.
Walking, sitting, and standing for any length of time became a struggle.
Gradually I put on weight... then more weight.
At the end, I was the heaviest I have ever been.
Those of you who lived through the last few years are aware I tried everything doctors recommended to get some weight off and take the pressure off of my spine.
I went to neurosurgeons, spinal specialists, chiropractors, and pain management doctors.
I managed some relief but there were no long term solutions.
I prayed and prayed for some kind of breakthrough that would end the pain that seemed to stretch out for years ahead of me.

In the process of all of this, one of the neurosurgeons suggested something that I never wanted. It is in fact on of the things I swore I would never do. It seemed so drastic. It was so permanent. It was so scary.

I told myself if one person, other than this doctor, suggested it again I would at least investigate it.
So when my specialist followed the same logic, I began to investigate.
About seven months ago I began this new journey towards Weight Loss Surgery.

I am very blessed to have in Northwest Arkansas one of the top surgeons in the country - Dr. Roller.
After a lot of prayer and questions, I began the process towards a Roux-en-Y Gastric Bypass.

On June 12 I finally had my surgery. Many of you knew about the surgery but most of you had no idea what I was actually undertaking.

As of tomorrow I am at 1 week post-op.
The last week has been tough. I don't want to sugar coat this journey for anyone because this kind of thing is no 'quick-fix' solution.
It's a complete life change.

I think I've written enough tonight. After my first month I am going to start posting pictures and such so y'all can keep tabs.
As for now, I need some sleep.
Thanks for reading, caring and praying!
-Gina

When the "Not" Is Likely

Without going to far into my situation... let's just say that things still have not worked out as I expected.
Going back to my last post - We seem to be in the fire without the deliverance... YET.
It's easy to say that God is in control when things are going as you planned and wanted.
It's not so easy to claim that reminder when things are not.
And if I hadn't said it yet - I'm living in the "Not."
Things have not gone as I hoped.
They may still work out as originally expected, but that looks less and less likely.

Do I still believe that God is in control?
Yes.
Without question - Yes.
Do I have a clue what is going to happen?
Nope.
So what happens now?
What happens when the uncertainty continues?
What happens when the 'certain yes' starts to be a no?

Life. Goes. On.

I'm not into backup plans.
I am into God's plan.
So I will wait.
I will pray.
I will see God's provision in His timing.

Psalm 27:13
I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living.

-Gina

But If Not and Pray for Your Pastors!

I used to write a daily devotional. I have hundreds of devotionals that I have written on different passages in the Bible.
Over my adult life, one theme has been constant in my spiritual walk - waiting.
Much has been said on it in the Bible... so clearly I'm not alone.
In talking with a friend the other day I made a statement that isn't new to me but is hitting me fresh these days.
We live in a fallen and broken world.
There are many good things. There is a lot of joy to be had.
But there is also a lot of pain.
There is a lot of loneliness.
There are a lot of people devastated in ways that are unfathomable.
Tonight one of my old devotionals is on my mind.

It's the story of Daniel and a couple of guys you might have heard about facing certain death.
BTW - Daniel - Lions? Fire? Guy had some troubles huh?

Daniel 3:17-18

If it be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of thine hand, O king. But if not, be it known unto thee, O king, that we will not serve thy gods, nor worship the golden image which thou hast set up.

These three young men were getting sentenced to death for following God instead of men. They didn't know whether God would save them or not... but they knew that He was able. They knew that no matter what they were going to obey God. It's a powerful story. Tonight there is much on my heart. Personally I have a situation where God has to come through. What I've learned: God may act exactly as I hope in this situation... but if not... I know He has something better ahead.

These three guys in the furnace trusted God, literally, with the end of their lives. They really believed that God could rescue them from the furnace. BUT they knew enough about God to know that what we think is best for us (including life itself) is not always God's best for us. So what did these three guys say as they faced death? "But IF not..." God I still trust you even if this doesn't go my way. I still trust you if the person I love the most in this world is taken away from me. I know that you can bring about miracles and you can take death itself away. I believe you can do all of this . . . but if not . . . I trust You even still.

The important thing is to not turn away from God when He doesn't follow your calendar and plan. It is my challenge for all of you whose answer is just days away... but it is not the answer you were looking to see. It is also my challenge for those of you whose answer is many waiting days away.

 - Gina

PS - pray for my brother Jeff and other ministers who deal with heartbreaking situations so often. On my heart tonight because of something specific... but needed every hour of every day for our ministers.

The Year That Flew

So once again I've got a little chunk of silence here in blog land.
I hereby apologize to my 3 readers.  :O)
2012 was dubbed the year of healing.

All along I've had an idea that this year was going to be full of surprises.
Marriage - Check - September 1st - hoping all my people can be there.
Major, Life-changing surgery - Check - June 12th
Did I mention living with a Man? - Welcome September 1st... you cannot get here soon enough. :P
Re-arranging and re-thinking how everything is done - Inevitable.

Today is May 25th, barely - 12:09 am.
Somehow this year has been the slowest and the fastest that I have ever experienced.
Since the middle of January I have been off work. Read that as zero incoming money since January 15th or so.
It's been a fight with our disability insurance as various people have drug feet and paperwork out.
It's been an incredible miracle to watch God stretch the savings that I had at the beginning of the year.
Praying that the stretch continues... but also that some money begins to draw back in!

The next few months will be a blur of pain, healing, wedding showers, moving, and wedding.

I cannot promise that I will write a word.
But I can promise that I will try!

In the mean time just know that life is moving. And if you're here close... come visit. Seriously  :O)
G

It is... what it is.

This seems to be my theme phrase so far this year.
Starting out January 1 I had no idea that things would be so drastically different on March 1.
But here we are. It is what it is.
Things are not bad on the grand scale of life.
They just aren't. When I look around at so many things in this world I still feel very fortunate.
I have a lot of people asking me to write again.
I just can't seem to get there.
I'm going to try to do better.
This year I definitely need physical healing. But I also need some spiritual and emotional fixing up as well.
So I am going to be thankful that the one thing I do have an abundance of at the moment is time.
Time to focus on where God is leading over the next few months.
Time to plan a WEDDING!
Time to heal physically, emotionally and spiritually.

Time is something that I won't always have. I really want to take full advantage of it for all that's ahead.
I think I'm rambling, :O) , but hey - it is, what it is!

Signing off for now. Nothing profound here. Move along.
-Gina

Sometimes I Still Think I Can Run

It hit me today when I was in the doctor's office waiting for him to come in.
I just wanted to run down the hallway to the next appointment.
I wanted to just get up and run. I wanted to run.
Sometimes, I still think I can run.
I can actually forget that many days find me almost unable to walk.

My friend Jeniffer shared a blog this week that pegs where I am right now. I'm not all better.


I had high hopes of blogging more this year. Maybe I can get to that. I've just not had anything I wanted to say. Frankly I've been trying to process the last few months.
Today it hit me why.

When I chose my "One word" for 2012 it came much later than usual. For the first time ever that I can remember it was sparked by something someone else said (my mother). Then the very next morning it was in my quiet time.

Those of you who have kept up with me this past year know that it has been physically very trying.
I have two bad discs in my back - one that bulges out often (due to a tear in it's protective layer) and one that just hates me. :P

I was on disability for 3 months last year. This January has seen me go back on disability for the foreseeable future. No more job. No more church except online. A whole lotta isolation.

My word for 2012 - healing. I believe that this year will see me regain my health.
That can be hard to believe on days like today when the pain is so intense and steady.
But I believe it.

2012 - HEALING

When I count my blessings on 1/1/2013 they will include my new husband (seriously!!!), a year full of change & learning, and healing.
I believe it now even through the tears and pain.
God will heal me this year.
I'm. Ready.

One Word - 2011 - Change

Well God definitely called my word for the year accurately.

This year there has been much change.

Disability for 3 months

Pain for 12 months

The inability to do many of the things I took for granted in 2010 and before.

Getting engaged

I’m trying to learn to roll with it and embrace change.

Sometimes I have been ready and excited.

Sometimes I have been flat out petrified.

But we have made it!

2012 is right around the corner and I know it holds more change.

But I want more from it. I want joyful change.

And this year one thing I have learned is that there are a lot of things that you cannot control.

But you can always take on your attitude. Notice I didn’t say chose it… on purpose! Because while it is true that you can chose your attitude, it would be dishonest (of me at least) to say that always happens.

Gotta be real here with my people.  :O)

So…

Change

Live it, Love it, Learn how to embrace it.  :O)

Bring on 2012.

The Proposal!

Well first of all - totally surprised!
God's timing in this, as in all things turns out to be pretty perfect after all.
Al has had plans in the works for a while but the timing has been bad so far this year for many reasons.
Early in November Dad and he went to a Razorback football game and Al asked my dad if he could marry me. 
Mid November I started planning a surprise party for Al. He turns 40 on the 6th!
So I started enlisting conspirators who then start also working behind my back.
Al knew that my brother from North Dakota was going to be here for these weeks around Thanksgiving - perfect time to pop the question.
So the planning began.

We started off the night at Buck Nekkid BBQ (which I think is hilarious that it's part of our engagement story!) :O)
After that we went to the Fayetteville square to see the lights.
We walked all the way around the square and were standing around talking about what we were going to do.
Amelia said that she and Jeff wanted a picture on a bench that was behind us and surrounded by lights.
After Al took their picture Amelia asked us if we wanted ours.

We got our picture on the bench and as I started to get up Al stopped me.
He got down on one knee and I happily said "Yes!"

Just afterwards we went and sat down on another bench while we waited for Jeff and Amelia.
A man came up in front of us with a violin and began to play "Oh Come Oh Come Emmanuel." Such a great cap to the night and completely unplanned.

We were blessed today to have Al's surprise party combined with an engagement party.
I'm sure I'll be an obnoxious engaged person... I've spent a lot of time building up to it.  :O)

So. In. Love.
So. Thankful!

Tender Places

Many nights in this past year I would describe my heart and soul as raw.
Spiritually it's been a blank period for me.
I've barely journaled.
I've only been able to attend church regularly online.
It's a dry period.
And the place I find myself in right now I think is best described by one word:

 Tender

I know why some of these places are tender. But not what to do with them.
When you have a broken arm (or screwed up back) you can easily tell people - Ouch - don't touch.
When your heart is tender it's not that easy to protect.
I find myself in a place I do not like.
I'm touchy about things that are in these tender spots.
Yet I cannot share with the world what they are in words.
Dreams not realized
Hopes just out of reach.
Painful absences... that do not make my heart fonder towards anything.
I resist the urge to cry out when that tender place is touched.
Those who are doing the wounding have no idea what their words have done.
They have no reason to. They cannot see the broken places.
Tonight I find myself reaching up and asking for God to begin to bind even the places I am unaware of right now.
Even if physical healing never comes, I realize the spiritual healing needed may be that much more desperaate.
But I believe that both healings are possible and are future.

Change - It was my word at the beginning of 2011. It is my word here at the close.
Please God, let none of these days be wasted.
Let the tender places be healed.

Wow. It's November People

I know you were waiting on me to tell you!  :O)
So much has not changed since my last check in.
I've been to yet another neurosurgeon who has given me the same kinda depressing news.
So stay tuned for some news on that front.
Since my word for the year was Change, I think the possible upcoming huge change would be appropriate.
Hope y'all are well.
I promise someday soon to return to my bloggy schedule I had started to stick to.
Pathetic.  :O)
Ohh and Blessing Baskets is here.  So don't expect that return to be before Thanksgiving!
-Gina

For My Uncle J. B.

I just finished watching a 10 part WWII documentary on Netflix.  Incredible.
About halfway through the series they covered Saipan.
Saipan is a teeny, tiny little Island in the Pacific that most people my age have probably never heard about.
Why did I know the name?
Because of my Great Uncle J. B.

On this teeny, tiny Island a very big battle was waged in June of 1944.  My uncle was there.
We have no details on how he died.
Watching this documentary is startling. I hesitate to mention it to my mother because of the shocking nature of what is spoken of and seen. I scan the videos for a recognizable face.
The whole picture painted reminds me how incredible these young men were to charge off of landing boats and onto shore; to run up hills into certain danger; to risk their lives to secure a future for the world as they knew it.
I'm in a bit of awe tonight.
And I'm remembering my Uncle.
In 2009 I found a website that showed where soldiers who had died in the Pacific had been buried. It's a place known as the Punch Bowl in Honolulu, Hawaii.
From a link on that site, I sent in a request and a lady I do not know went to my Uncle's grave, placed a flower, and took a picture.
That gesture means so much more to me tonight as I understand that sacrifice a little better.
So thankful for a heritage of service and for men like my Uncle J.B. that have served and still serve our country today.
G

Help Me Outta My Hand-Me-Downs

So one of the fun blogs writers I follow - Kenlie is doing a give away that is helping me to seriously covet.
Cephalon is giving away a cookware set.
Gina. Wants.  :O)
We all know that I don't own a single piece of cookware that I have actually purchased myself. Everything I have came from someone else's kitchen.
Jump on over and check in out.  But don't even think about winning, cause this one is mine people.
http://www.alltheweigh.com/2011/09/calphalon/